I Want

Clinique Happy

D&G light blue- paubos na eh

Kenneth Cole Black


Rayban shades
Netbook/Ipad
Bag

omigosh!

I saw my dream house in Sentosa Singapore while I was looking for a cheap package online.
My sister is giving us free package as her xmas gift. We're suppose to go there on Dec16-18 kaso expired na passport ko. So siguro saka na lang pag sure na yung passport. Wish ko lang makita ko yung dream house ko kung makapunta man.

NU Rock to NU Pop. Pakkk!

Confirmed na nga mawawala na NU107 huhu. So so sooo saaadddd! Konti na nga lang matinong radio station tapos mawawala pa. Everyday yun ang radio station ko tuwing nagddrive ako. Malamang uulan na ng kakornihan for life! Juskolord, kelangan pa ba imemorize yan? 

Time to look for another good radio station :(

26

Isang kabaliwan. Eto nanaman siyaaaa. Parating nanaman ang special date na toh. Well, sakin lang naman special to, sa iba wala parang ordinary days lang. Ayun.

I used to write all of his texts in a notebook. Naging addiction ata yun sakin. Ultimo simpleng quote or isang word lang yun text niya or a smiley face sinusulat ko pa rin including date and time. Pag magkagalit kami or gusto ko kiligin or emo ako binabasa ko lang siya paulit-ulit tapos ok na ulit ako. Siguro may dahilan yun. Memories. Unfortunately hanggang dun na lang. Sabi nga niya "good times never last".

Ang  hirap pala mag move on. Akala ko dati naka move on na ko pero hindi pa pala. It's been five fuckin years pero nagseselos pa rin ako. Minsan naiisip ko siguro may nilagay siya na gayuma sa pinapadeliver namin na Jollibee, or sa yosi na hinihingi ko sa kanya dati or sa french fries na binili nya sa labas ng bahay nila. Baka meron nga. Laway.

Now, there's only one thing I can do--cherish those great memories. Memories sa Jollibee (palaboy night at di ako makauwi), Octoberfest sa SM (I realized na laging andyan si Jollibee tuwing kailangan), breakfast sa Mcdo, Starbucks (Shang Makati when I gave him wallet and we talked about his dad), Starbucks sa Glorietta, sa Town, Festi, dinner with Jovy sa Gerry's, TGIF, CPK, KFC, Kenny, Tokyo2, kainan sa Singgalong, magubos ng oras sa U with his Bosco friends, double date sa Baywalk, dinner sa Gilligans on the day na nagkaron ng ayala bus bombing on valentine's day.

I remember we even watched The Grudge and I thought he was sweet. We laughed when we found out na sinagot ni Bianx si Allen on Nov1. Kinilig ako when he gave me flowers nun nasa Canyonwoods. We enjoyed    Fete de la Musique kahit magkagalit at nagpapakiramdaman kami. I watched his basketball game kahit puyat at walang tulog.

I miss walking with him sa Makati and wait for a taxi. I miss riding bus with him. Miss ko rin yung halos maubos oras namin kakaisip kung san kakain and who's gonna decide where.

We used to talk over the phone almost every minute. Nagrereview siya sa madaling araw at nagtatrabaho naman ako at the same time magkausap kami sa phone.. Magkausap kami hanggang makatulog na. Thanks to Sun at may unli calls kahit 15minutes na putol-putol.

I miss those times na nakahiga lang kami sa kama, madilim, and we talked about our dreams. Sabi niya mangangarap na lang din naman eh lubus-lubusin na.

Ayun, memories. Siyeeet. Minsan ok kami, madalas hindi. Basta alam ko masaya ako nun nakilala ko siya. Nakakasira ng ulo. Kelangan ko ata mauntog ng malupetttt para makalimot. He wants me out of his life eh. Kaya niya eh. Buti pa siya. 

Nalorkey na ata talaga ko sa kanya. Pero sabi nila nagagamot naman daw to. Malapit na siguro ako gumaling:) Sana.

Waiting but hopefully not in vain

Hindi lang naman cguro sya. All of us spend most of our time waiting: waiting for class dismissal, waiting for food to be served, waiting for shift to end, waiting for a bus to arrive, waiting for someone's text, waiting for the right opportunity, waiting for someone you love, etc. Nakakainip pero there's always a right time for everything. 

And I'm just waiting for that right time, but for some reason, that right time might not come cuz he's losing hope. Well karapatan nya mawalan ng pagasa and what the heck, hindi ko matanggap. I know I'm asking too much.  

Blame me for wasting his time, but my time was much wasted not being with him. Nakakasira ng ulo.

There's nothing worse than knowing who you want but wasting time with somebody and still wanting someone you know you can no longer have.

Fingers crossed I know God has a perfect timing for his plans for us.

For the mean time, life goes on.

Sana hindi ako paiyakin ni Lord. 

And please Bob Marley, wag mo ko kantahan.

1on1

Bilang lang ang taong nagpapaiyak sakin. Dumagdag na sa listahan si Chan. Ewan ko ba at masyadong seryoso usapan namin kanina. We talked about stories in the bible kanina and how humans lived to a great old age just like Methuselah who lived for 969 years. We talked about religions. Sabi ko kasi parents ko christian na just like him tapos ako catholic parin pero minsan umaattend ako sa mass nila kasi gusto ko yung sinasabi ng pastor. He told me na si maica iba rin religion. Mormon. Meron pala talagang ganun. Pwede naman pala magkaiba ang religion ng magasawa..stig. 

New topic. Anyway, lagi nya ko binibiro na hindi kami bagay. Malaki sya, maliit ako, mabait sya, pasaway ako. Naoover power ko daw siya lagi. Sabi nya madalas daw pag bf gf nagiging magkamukha daw pag tumatagal. Pero malabo daw yun samin. kasi nga hindi daw ako bagay sa kanya. Sabi ko marami na nagsabi nyan.

Hanggang sa napunta na usapan na mahina ako. Emotional talaga ko pagdating dun eh. Bihira lang naman ako magkwento at piling tao lang nakakaalam nun. Basta sabi lang niya na ngayon lang daw nya ko naintindihan. Pero i should still try to follow my heart daw kasi yun lang din daw ang makakalaban ko pag tumagal. Naiyak ako. Walang tissue. May call na pumasok. Umiyak na lang ako.

Don't point that finger, yo!

Awww snap! My message wasnt even meant for you. It was for someone in the office who THEY call "panget or hipon". Why do you have to react like that?

bz

Kelangan ko maging busy, kasing busy nya. Ayoko naman na xa lang, dapat ako din. Kaso kahit anung busy ko mas busy pa rin xa eh nyahaha. Busy-busihan lang siguro ako, kunwari busy, pero hindi busy, pero talaga naman busy eh. Talo lang ako kasi kahit busy ako, may makita lang akong bagay, may naaalala na agad ako. Lugi kasi sentimental lahat ng bagay sakin, sa kanya hindi..nyahaha.

Tama na ako...

it's not supposed to hurt this way....

...like a liar looking for forgiveness from a stone